Club Bali Hai Moorea Hotel

Club Bali Hai is the type of place your grandparents went on their honeymoon — and the type of place they’d be thrilled to return to — because absolutely nothing’s changed since they were there last. Decor throughout the hotel can largely be summed up as “lots of wood paneling,” and the hotel’s only update since 1980 might be the free Wi-Fi that’s available in the lobby. But surprisingly, Bali Hai’s success seems to sprout from its lack of change. People keep coming back because they love the hotel’s consistency, and rock-bottom prices, in a place where newer, more expensive hotels seem to be pop up by the minute. Plus, Bali Hai’s storied history lets long-time customers relive “the good old days” in a place that hasn’t changed much since then. Many of the guests here are time-share owners, adding to the sense of community. The cats and chickens roaming the ground contribute to the very casual feel.
In the late 1950s, three young Californians — Don McCallum, Jay Carlisle, and Hugh Kelley — moved to Moorea from Newport Beach. Outlandishly foreign, and known for their shenanigans, the trio became known as the “Bali Hai Boys,” and dabbled in everything from vanilla farming to the tourism industry. In 1982 the trio took over the Hotel Aimeo, and transformed it into the Club Bali Hai. Since then, the hotel has been a Moorea institution, where generations of local families work and generations of foreign tourists come back year after year.

Club Bali Hai is located on Cook’s Bay, a popular spot for tourists thanks to its incredible scenery and central location on the island. Cook’s Bay is home to a few other hotels, and there are shops, restaurants, and grocery stores within walking distance. (Some shops and restaurants will even pick up and drop guests off in exchange for their patronage.) Guests spending more than a day or two in Moorea should probably rent a car (or scooter); there's a place renting both across the street (it also offers Jet Skis and a variety of tours, and some tours leave from the hotel's own dock). While taxis are widely available, they can be expensive and terribly difficult to get ahold of. Club Bali Hai is about a 15-minute drive to the airport, and about a 20-minute drive to the Moorea Ferry Terminal.
Moorea is a mountainous island located 10 nautical miles off the coast of Tahiti. The beautiful, quiet island is popular with honeymooners and families, and has a relaxed, laid-back feel. Travelers headed to Moorea will first need to fly to Papeete, Tahiti, where they can then take a quick 10-minute local flight or a 45-minute ferry to Moorea.

If the Brady Bunch ever decided to take a vacation to French Polynesia, their hotel rooms would probably resemble Club Bali Hai’s. Wood-paneled walls, cheesy Hawaiian-print bed-spreads, mirrored closets, fake flowers — you get the idea. Rooms at Bali Hai won’t be winning any interior decorating awards (at least in this century), but they’re fairly spacious and designed with families in mind. All rooms have multiple beds, kitchenettes, and large balconies that overlook the otherworldly Cook’s Bay. Bathrooms are small and dated, with tight shower stalls, lots of mirrors, and no tubs.
One amenity noticeably missing from the rooms? TVs. You won't find any at Bali Hai, save for the tiny flat-screen mounted on the wall in the lobby. The hotel has a few overwater bungalows, but they’re not completely over the water. Instead they’re built on land with balconies that extend into the bay. However, the overwater bungalows here are among the cheapest you’ll find in Polynesia.

As a way to keep operating costs low, Club Bali Hai doesn’t have many amenities. There’s no spa or fitness center, or even a fully operational restaurant. Instead, there’s a mid-size pool, a restaurant that’s open sometimes, and a handful of nice freebies to keep guests appeased.
The mid-size pool at Bali Hai sits in the center of the property and offers stunning views of Cook’s Bay. It’s surrounded by a few plastic lounge chairs, but don’t expect towel service or poolside cocktail servers. A few steps from the pool is a small, sandy beach that leads directly into the bay. It’s tiny, and clearly man-made, but the water in the bay is crystal clear and full of marine life. The hotel has free snorkel equipment and free kayaks for guests to use during their stay.
Blue Pineapple, the hotel’s on-site restaurant, serves pretty good food for breakfast and lunch, but its operating hours can be painfully frustrating. It’s not always open, and the hotel never really posts a schedule of when it is or isn’t; so guests are left to fend for themselves when it comes to meal planning. Luckily, there are plenty of restaurants and snack stands in the Cook’s Bay area, so guests can easily eat elsewhere if the Blue Pineapple isn’t open. When it is open, the restaurant serves local Tahitian specialities, like freshly caught mahi mahi, poisson cru, and on Sunday mornings, homemade doughnuts.
Each week, Club Bali Hai hosts a Polynesian night that’s free for all guests to attend. The evening consists of a local dance performance, followed by a seafood barbecue buffet at the Blue Pineapple. While dinner isn’t free, the performance is (a rarity in Polynesia), and the dance is often lauded as one of the best around.
There’s free Wi-Fi in the lobby, but not in the guest rooms. The Wi-Fi works fairly well, as long as there aren’t a bunch of people trying to connect to it at once.